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Insecurity is a funny thing, one would think as she got older she would become more confident, not so in my case. I have never really had a problem with insecurity, oh sure, there are the natural ones in the teen years, but I never struggled much with it as most of them had to do with appearances, and well I knew “beauty was only skin deep”. My insecurities now don’t have much at all to do with appearances anyway so they are much harder to handle. I started to feel inadequate in many aspects of my life after I had our third baby. I also started to feel guilty…wait what. I second guess myself all the time and it annoys me so I know it annoys the people around me. I have always been able to make a decision, stick with it, and usually back it up, not so much anymore. I am not really sure where it is stemming from or what is driving it, wait yes I am, satan. The devil is something else and since I have let my spiritual life slide in the last ten years, he has taken full advantage. It is time to get back on track and reunite with my Savior and let Him go to battle for me. It is exhausting trying to battle insecurities by myself and frankly I cannot do it. They creep up again and again never relenting. God can have all these insecurities and this second guessing because it is miserable. I need to remember I was created for a purpose and that I have a role in the body, but as Matt said, “I cannot be the foot if I was designed to be the hand”. Well, I cannot be anything until I get my relationship with my Savior back on track. I think His Word would be a great place to start.


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